After 21/2 semesters of German (I need 4 semesters as an English major), the only phrase I can say with any degree of certainty is “Ich bin doof!”(I am stupid!) Here is the typical class room scenario for me:
I walk into the room, plop myself down cautiously beside “smart girl” who knows every noun, verb, pronoun, grammatical rule, etc in the German language and seems almost more knowledgeable than Herr “C” much of the time.
Next, either smart girl or I pull out candy(skittles, nerds or gobstoppers) which we proceed to eat for the remainder of the class…coffee will do too. It is amazing how a revolting cup of campus coffee can become delicious when you need some kind of comfort in a class you feel totally alien in! I sit lost and confused, furiously writing down notes that never seem to make sense soon enough.
At an unexpected moment our very kind, understanding professor, who tends to let me off the hook for class participation, may suddenly spring a question on me. There is an inevitable pause followed by a flash of terror across my face. A long “Ummm” escapes my lips and then, well, the rest is sinking or swimming. The class waits with baited breath to see if “stupid girl” will actually answer correctly. Usually their first assumptions are proven true.
Class is let out 15 minutes earlier than most classes and I walk up to Herr “C” and ask for more extra credit opportunities as I know this is the only way I will pass in this hideously difficult subject. Foreign language must utilize the same brain cells as math, or I hope so anyways, because at least then I can claim disadvantage of heredity. Either way, “Ich heisse Susanna und ich bin doof!”