We all ponder how much weight we’ve put on when we get together. “Sarah” stands back and asks intently, “Have I gained any weight since you last saw me?” It may have only been a week but she feels certain that there must be a difference. “Dana” eats a small piece of chocolate cake and then embarks soon after on a one hour walk or run. I “over eat” and then torture myself by feeling my expanded stomach, wishing I could be more disciplined. Despising the flesh, There is no way that any of us feel beautiful much less reasonably attractive in this state.
I sometimes wonder how this narrow and self-debasing view of ourselves can evolve and change into something hopeful and productive. We are two wives and one happily settled in a serious relationship yet it is obvious that the love and appreciation of the opposite sex, no matter how unconditional, has not made us fully accepting of ourselves.
What will our future children, especially daughters, think of themselves if they here their mothers degrading themselves on the scale or in front of the mirror? It is a forward spiral and one that it has become obvious no age/life stage can cure…12, 15, 18, 21, 26…we’ll reach thirty and tarnish our peak years in discouragement compounded by stretch marks.
Granted beauty originated in perfection but it was not our warped, 21st century, plastic surgery, air brushed perceptions of beauty. Eve was doubtless a voluptuous women with shameless curves…a Renaissance icon. I could be wrong, who really knows for sure how the first woman appeared, but I am sure I can safely assume she was no Twiggy yet God and Adam thought and proclaimed that she was perfect.
However this disease has compounded, I hope that we can be freed from its bonds, rejoice and give thanks for how God has created us, take comfort in the appreciative gazes of our men and actively live the words, “charm is deceptive and beauty is fleeting but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised.” I once wrote that verse with red lipstick on my mirror as a single. I think it is time to write it there again. The truth is that if things don’t change, we’re glaring at God as if He really messed up, we’re showing our husbands/boyfriends that their appreciation is not sufficient, we’re practicing bad habits for the future self-worth of our children and we’re basically just ruining a lot of potentially great moments in this beautiful life! Can things change? I hope so, I know so.