Part 2: Moving Us Forward

Oh, the last post probably confused you all…everything is well that ends well! Basically, Rick had the job but just had to iron out the formal salary agreement and not only has an agreement been reached but it is far better than we had hoped…we are indescribably grateful! God is really moving us forward and taking care of us…but why should I have ever doubted he would?!

* * * *

Reflections…

Some where in the shuffle of our moving plans, I have come to peace with who I am in Jesus Christ. No more burdensome moments wondering if I really can be His and if there really is ultimate assurance in this life.

As we were flying over New York on our way back to Atlanta, I looked down over the Brooklyn Bridge, the harbor and just sat in silent amazement at His creation. There are many moments in which I am realizing acknowledging all He has made is just as valuable as praying and reading the bible.

Growing up with parents deeply committed to seeing their five children know and develop a strong relationship with God as I did, who could have known early confidence would turn to confusion as has been my experience but yet, unfortunately, I have discovered this is an all too common occurrence. When true faith comes through personal commitment and can not be inherited or earned, knowing for sure can be an agonizing process. Is this true faith or just all I’ve ever known? Am I a mere robot? How can I know any thing for certain? Is this my own faith?

I’ve never thrown in the towel. I’ve searched for answers to my questioning heart here, there and everywhere but when all is said and done, I’ve known many of the answers all along and an introduction to God and His son early on really was enough for the rudimentary seeds to be planted. Enough for me, with child like faith, to be drawn to Him with an earnestness. Drawn and not because of anything I did or can do. Ask me a day, a time, a place and I can’t give you an answer. What I can tell you though is that it is not the birth but the life of faith that is pivotal…the maturing, development and ultimate survival through thick and thin. No, my salvation story will never contain great dramatics and prodigal son-like comparisons. Sorry.

God has given me an abundance of loneliness in my life but as I look back, it has always served as a constant reminder that He is all that I need and will never be fair weather. “You’ll be lonely in New York” is a statement which really does not throw me. Perhaps I will be; I can’t know until we move there. I do know though that with God ahead of us, Rick and Micah beside me, there really is no better company!

What scares me most is that I will forget all that I am learning is this season of life. We’ll move, settle, have fun and forget who got us there and performed great things to see the process through. As the late Christian singer/songwriter Keith Green sang, “Help me to follow through, make every day a devotion to You…”


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6 Responses to Part 2: Moving Us Forward

  1. maryanne helms says:

    And all those times you were wondering and questioning your faith, I saw then and still see today a strong, Godly woman. Eyes fixed firmly above, feet planted solidly on the ground. You will take your quiet strength to New York and bless others. I know you will!

  2. Rick says:

    We are both in the same boat with early faith that was ambiguous about the when and where. But I’ve learned, and when someone asks for your testimony or when you first became a Christian – the answer – Before the creation of the world, God chose me, and that’s when I became a Christian.

  3. bchallies says:

    Great attitude to take to NY, Hon!

  4. Neo says:

    Rose - When God gets around to listening to you, ask him to please listen to me eh?Maybe he’s deaf to me Good luck with NY.Peace & Hugs, Neo

  5. Susanna Rose says:

    Well, I spilled my guts in this post so thanks for appreciating my honesty! Babe-Yup, before the creation. I love Caedomon Call’s song that says, “When I was young, you were my breath and heartbeat. Born in the dark, you were the hand that held me. You opened my eyes and called me unto salvation. Your infinite love echos in all creation…!”Neo-Well, let me see how to best answer…as I said, I’ve never thrown in the towel…even in hard times where I thought God was not there perhaps, he has always been hearing me BUT I HAVE NOT ALWAYS BEEN AROUND TO HEAR HIS VOICE! We’re the problems, not Him and if we’re only praying to Him just when we need something, HE’S NOT A SLOT MACHINE! He’s so much bigger and better than instant gratification, etc. Even if He never answered a single one of our prayers (which will never happen) He would still be God and His plans would prevail. How many times does He answer our prayers and NEVER gets thanks/acknowledgement for it? WAY TO MANY! Without faith in his person,power, plans and sovereignty, faith in Him will never be able to last cause it will be based on so many of our own stipulations. Our plans/desires, not His.

  6. Grace says:

    I’m so glad to hear that everything is working out! So glad…yet a little bit sad because I will miss you all so much but on the bright side we can now visit you and the big city:)

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