One of my passions in life, (and thus a topic I write about often), has morphed into encouraging younger stay-at-home moms such as myself; letting them know that though our culture and the lies it spins can at times feel defeating, they are just that much of the time…lies. From one month post-college graduation until now and into the future, much of my identity has and will be founded on my calling as a mom. The official titles I’ve held in my adult life are wife and “mama” and I love these titles as they are the ones I desired most from the time I was young and to be blessed with a husband who is not ashamed of my choice to be a home-maker is an added bonus I can not take for granted!
Still, there are the values of society tugging at my mind sometimes. The fear I am lacking important experiences, am inadequate for the task because of my under thirty-five status or frankly, much too simple-minded to think that being mommy is the bee’s knees! For example, take this article from Eliza magazine entitled, “When Baby is the New Black.” The author writes:
Conversely , a woman who bears her first child in her mid-thirties or later has had more time for career and personal development. She is likely more grounded in her self-identity due to the simple fact that she has had more time to do so. She has either experienced her full career path before rearing children, or can continue what she has already built up. She is often wiser, more patient, more experienced.”
Notice being a good mother is knowing yourself more, having the experience of a full career, self-identity. Are any of these points ultimately important to God? If He wills you have these things more than someone else before having children, great, but it is amazing that society honestly believes these take away from the value of a young, “less experienced” mom. And having more than less time to grow in self-awareness can be a disadvantage as it means a dying to oneself once children come along may well be that much more difficult and painful. Interestingly, No where is self-sacrifice mentioned in the article or a nod to the fact that a young mom has much wisdom gleaned from experience to give to a woman just having her first child in her late thirties.
And quite honestly, how can I look at my son or feel my daughter and not believe this calling before me is perhaps becoming the road less popular yet a path worth taking?:)