Will It Feel The Same?

When I haven’t been stressing over the recent leak in our basement or attempting to get our apartment into some semblance of order post-Christmas, one major fear has been nagging at my heart. As awful as it may sound, I have been worried about how much love and affection I will feel towards this next baby.

When he/she is delivered and placed on my chest, will it feel the same as it did with Micah and Ellie? The same pure joy, wonder and adoration? How can one person give adequately to three, three who are yet so fully dependent on me being there for them?

I must sound like a wimp really. And don’t get me wrong…I really am so excited about this new little one growing inside of me and anticipating his/her arrival. I am, in simplest terms, just freaking out a little I guess! My line of vision is so small and I suppose I am not yet able to fully grasp the vast amounts of love God places in the hearts of mothers. Whether one child or twenty, we can become far more than we ever would have thought possible by looking to Him and trusting in His strength!

A song comes to mind as well, one of my favorites, “How great the love of Jesus Christ, how vast beyond all measure…!” Would I never fear there could possibly be a cap on love…would I seek to emulate the love of Jesus, which is “vast beyond all measure.” To the children we are blessed with, would I welcome each one as a unique blessing and love with a sacrificial love, that each would feel treasured no matter the number!

Thank you God for growing another little person inside of me and using me as a life-giving vessel! I feel so inadequate for the calling. May Your power be displayed through my weakness!

This entry was posted in Mommy, Inc.. Bookmark the permalink.

6 Responses to Will It Feel The Same?

  1. Grace says:

    What a beautiful post…and I KNOW you will have more than enough love for baby # 3:)

  2. Anonymous says:

    Youa nd Rick have done a great job so far with two. Apart from that added element of chaos that a third introduces, I am sure you will both find that your love for two is large enough to embrace a third. It sort of expands like an old man's stomach.Dad

  3. Anonymous says:

    Don't you worry about that…You will laugh at yourself for even fearing inadequate love for number three…Mom

  4. Anonymous says:

    Good to talk today. Love and prayers! And you will ADORE that baby. Just ask Grace about Will and I:). We are TIGHT!Maryanne

  5. Mella says:

    Hi Susanna!Congratulations on number 3! Seems like only yesterday you were expecting Micah and now look at you – you've caught up to me in no time! :)(And you'll probably beat me to number 4 – I need a preggo break for a while – ha!) :)Your family looks beautiful and healthy and loved as always. And you have a mother's heart – it will expand to the ends of the earth to fit all of love for all the children God blesses you with. :)I know that when Asher was first placed in my arms, the bond was even more instant than with my first two – as crazy as that might seem.

  6. Susanna Rose says:

    Thank you everyone for your encouragement that everything WILL fall into place! And Mella, how awesome that you felt an even greater bond immediately with your third! That gives me GREAT hope!!!:)

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s